Q: My husband and I both work and have children. My husband works two jobs so I am responsible for taking care of the children and household responsibilities in the evening. I am feeling very overwhelmed, but my husband insists he has to work the second job to pay our bills. I feel like our life is out of balance and we have to make changes or our marriage will suffer. Where do I start?

A: People often make the assumption if they get help fixing their finances their life will automatically become less stressful. The problem with this kind of thinking is that their finances are not the problem, their thoughts about money and their life in general are. In order to get your money situation under control, you need to look at your attitude towards money. Does this attitude serve you or slave you? Find out your underlying beliefs about money and question whether they are appropriate to your goals and what you want out of life.

A good place to start is looking at your budget. Where and how do you spend your money? Are the things you are spending your money on feeding your personal growth and happiness or just taking up space and time? What could you feel good about spending less on? If you have debt, are their ways to consolidate it so other areas of your budget are freed up? If you look closely at your spending and the thoughts behind it, you may see that there are areas you would feel good about eliminating excess spending. It’s not about taking away from yourself; it’s about giving to yourself and family. You don’t have to do a complete budget overhaul at once; small changes over time can get you to your larger goal.

Many people feel overwhelmed with responsibility and can’t get it all done. I have talked in the past about using turtle steps to create large changes in your life. If you are feeling overwhelmed with household responsibilities, look at ways to get chores accomplished that won’t consume all of your time. Delegate a specific amount of time to each task on a daily basis and walk away when the time is up. Realize there will always be something to do, but you have to the choice of when it gets done.
Do you have a question for Laura? Email her at:Laura@corelifedesign.com

Laura Tirello is a Life and Career Coach.  Her company, Core Life Design, works with people who are looking to find their highest potential both in their careers and personal lives. She helps her clients develop a life plan for success and create a balanced life. For more information about Laura and her life coaching business, visit corelifedesign.com or email Laura at Laura@corelifedesign.com.

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